First Diction Practice Paired Paragraphs

Today, you will be practicing your own diction skills and using some of the strategies you observed as you analyzed the rhetorical choices made by the authors of the Okefenokee Swamp passages.

Your Task: Write a set of paired passages on a single topic. Discuss the same information or events, but use different diction choices throughout each in order to clarify two different purposes, tones, or points of view.

Topics: Select an event, a place, or a concept to define or describe. Try to pick something that is personally significant and somewhat unique -- this will help you avoid cliche and provide plenty of material for description. Write from your experience -- this is not a fiction selection.

Process:
1. Before you begin drafting your paragraph, plan the contrast you will create between the first and second paragraphs. Articulate clearly what feelings, beliefs, values, priorities, emotions, or learning experiences you wish to communicate.

2. Take time to brainstorm every detail you can about the place, event, or idea. Describe the concept with all five senses. Discuss associated ideas or events. 

3.  Make sure both paragraphs are clear, well-organized, and fully developed. Both paragraphs need to be detailed descriptions or discussions, and should demonstrate an ability to write fluently and effectively.

Okefenokee Paired Passages Assignment

In this exercise, we will be looking at the diction choices made by two different authors to discuss the same subject under different circumstances.

Read both passages. Then, 

A. In one or two sentences, describe the purpose or point of view presented in the second paragraph

B. Write a well-developed (three-chunk) paragraph analyzing the diction choices used by the author to establish and communicate this purpose.

Diction Analysis Body Paragraph Evaluation

	Inadequate Skill	Developing Skill	Adequate/Consistent Skill	Exemplary Skill
Para. Format 15%	Poor development or absence of multiple elements seriously hinders clarity of paragraph. Organization and/or presence of elements is haphazard or seems random.	Insufficient development or absence of one or more elements harms the clarity or organization of the paragraph. Poor proportion or incorrect order of detail and commentary significantly undermines clarity of analysis.	All paragraph elements are present and ordered correctly, but may be inconsistently developed. Concrete detail may be presented in inconsistent order or inappropriate proportion, but generally these elements function properly in their development of the paragraph.	All paragraph elements are present, thoroughly developed, and in the correct order. Paragraph begins with a topic sentence, alternates between concrete detail and commentary, and uses an effective conclusion. commentary and concrete detail and presented in appropriate proportion
Topic Sentence	Topic sentence is attempted, but fails to meet the three criteria.	One or two  elements of the topic sentence may be absent, though an attempt to establish topic is made.	Topic sentence may be inconsistent or unclear in its development of one of the three elements.	Topic sentence raises the issue to be discussed, establishes its relevance the prompt, and makes a clear analytical claim requiring support.
Evidence	A concrete detail sentence is attempted, but may confuse fact and opinion, repeat ideas from the topic sentence, or lack specific reference to quoted text.	Concrete detail is present, but relevance is not clear. Sentence may use overgeneralized, inaccurate or unclear supporting evidence. Orphaned quotes may be used.	Concrete detail provides evidence, but broad or vague wording may hinder clarity. Evidence is relevant, but relevance may be implied rather than clearly expressed with transitions. Incorporation of quotes may be awkward or repetitive.	Text-based evidence is directly relevant to claim. Transition words or phrases indicate relevance of evidence. Quotes are incorporated into blended sentences. Writer selects most effective, relevant examples of the diction choices
Analysis	Commentary is attempted, but lacks relevance to topic sentence, fails to explain concrete detail, or reveals lack of understanding rather than demonstrating insight.	Commentary addresses topic and concrete detail, but fails to demonstrate one or more of the following:clarity, insight, detail, focus, or transitions. Commentary may be repetitive or vague	Clear, two-part commentary discusses relevance of concrete detail to thesis. However, analysis may be less specific, insightful, detailed, or effectively worded.	Commentary provides an insightful analysis of evidence 1. explaining the meaning / ideas established this word choice and 2. analyzing how this meaning or impact is effective, given the purpose and rhetorical situation of the piece.
Conventions	Significant and repeated conventions errors, inappropriate word choice, and confusing / incomplete / run-on sentences significantly interfere with communication of author's meaning.	Writing demonstrates repeated patterns of incorrect spelling, grammar, or punctuation. Word choice and sentence structure are imprecise, repetitive, awkward, or confusing.	Rare conventions errors do not distract from meaning of passage. Word choice may lack power, variety, or precision, but is generally effective. Sentence may include some awkward constructions, but still clearly communicate ideas	Writing follows conventions for grammar, punctuation, and spelling. Sentence use effective, engaging, precise wording. Sentence structure is varies and avoids awkward or wordy constructions

Pattern of Rhetorical Analysis

1. Clearly Articulate the author's purpose.
What is the audience expected to  
*learn * believe * feel * do *
Pay attention to the rhetorical situation: 
*Question at Issue * Kairos * Audience
2. Identify and describe a rhetorical strategy used to support this purpose
3. Provide specific text as concrete evidence of the use of this strategy.
4. Explain the specific meaning established by the use of this rhetoric -- what specific ideas are created and/or how do we know this passage is an example of the strategy you identified?

NOTE! It is a really good idea to incorporate both #3 and #4 into a single blended sentence. For example, if I'm discussing connotative diction, I might include the quote in a sentence explaining the emotional connotations of the word choices that the author made.

5. Analyze how this rhetorical strategy in this context supports some specific aspect of the author's purpose in this rhetorical situation. Be as specific as possible about the effect the use of this rhetoric has. 

Diction Activity for Ivins Reading

Step 1: Read the selection and clearly identify the author's purpose. (on assignment paper)

Step 2: Identify as many diction devices as possible (annotation)

Step 3: Generally characterize the different diction choices made by the author. -- in other words, group the examples according to the type of rhetorical strategy used, referring to line numbers and word choices (on assignment paper)

Step 4: Draw a conclusions about how Ivins uses TWO of these types of diciton (on assignment paper)

Using the pattern of analysis to create paragraphs: Diction

Analytical writing requires the application of both content area knowledge and the use of basic organization and writing fluency skills.

Identify the author's purpose

Identify a rhetorical device being used (a diction device)

Provide quoted evidence of this diction technique being used.

Explain what specifically about the choice of words fits the definition of the rhetorical strategy

Analyze/explain how this adds meaning to the selection. Rhetorical strategies are used so that the author can do more than one thing at a time.

Ex.
connotative diction = information + emotion
jargon = information + credibility
abstract wording = information + audience's personal interpretation or understanding

Finally, conclude by explaining why providing that additional meaning helps the author accomplish his/her purpose

Helpful Links for MLA Format

1. You can always use the MLA writing guides at the Purdue Online Writing Lab or the University of Wisconsin-Madison

2. You can refer to this image  or this page to format your works cited page and this image for an example of the first page of your MLA paper.

Attributive Tag Keywords and Examples

According to          Acknowledges          Adds

Admits                   Advises                     Agrees

Argues                   Asserts                      Believes

Claims                   Comments                Compares

Concedes               Concludes                 Confirms

Contends                Declares                   Denies

Disagrees               Discusses                  Disputes

Emphasizes            Endorses                   Explains

Finds                      Grants                       Illustrates

Implies                   Insists                       Notes

Observes                Points out                  Reasons

Refutes                   Rejects                      Replies

Reports                   Responds                  States

Suggests                 Thinks                       Writes

 Here are some sample ways to use attributive tags:

Up front: According to UN Secretary General Ban Ki Moon, the Palestinian conflict has entered “a new phase of acrimony and accusation”(Cite).

In the middle: The escalating tensions have been confirmed by UN Secretary General Ban Ki Moon, who contends that the region is facing a “new phase of acrimony and accusation”(Cite).

At the end: There continues to be a hope of lasting peace, despite the current period of “acrimony and accusation” observed by UN Secretary General Ban Ki Moon (Cite).

My Words

Credibility

Tag Keyword

Quoted Text

Classical Argument Rubric

	Inadequate --1	Development --2	Competent --3	Exemplary --4
Claim Clear articulation of thesis and development of effective supporting arguments	Thesis is missing, supporting contentions are weak, or paper's argument does not present a clear, coherent position.	Thesis is present, but requires clarification. Quality/effectiveness of paragraph topic sentences is inconsistent. Supporting claims require clarification and development.	Thesis is present, but may require clarification or more effective articulation. OR Topic sentences are present and effective, but may require clarification of relevance to thesis or articulation of paragraph's purpose OR Claims may oversimplify / overlook the complexities of the issue.	Presents a clear, effective thesis. Topic sentences establish effective supporting claims that are directly and clearly relevant to the thesis. Argument demonstrates clear insight into the complexities of the issue and identifies/responds to opposing points of view
Inartistic Selection of abundant, effective, and credible supporting information from a variety of sources	Evidence is limited, lacks relevance to claims, or inadequately supports the thesis	All paragraphs include some evidence, but support is rarely thorough and demonstrates limited understanding of the evidence available to support the claims made.	Effective evidence is used, but evidence of thorough support is inconsistent.  Writer may use evidence that, though appropriate, is not the most effective available, mat not be clearly states, or may not consistently establish credibility of sources with attributive tags	All body paragraphs use multiple clear, relevant, quoted or paraphrased examples from research. Writer selects most effective or informative examples available uses attributive tags, and limits length of quotes to help focus the topic of discussion.
Artistic Consistent, intentional use of analysis, appeals, or creative wording to support the argument	In many cases, commentary is inaccurate or poorly linked to evidence. Effective use of word choice, analysis, or appeals is absent	Commentary generally requires clarification and development. Does not appear to consistently use appeals, word choice, and analysis to effectively address audience or occasion.	Evidence is consistently supported by discussion and analysis, but this commentary may need clarification or development. Use of appeals, word choice, or reasoning are less consistent or appropriate for the audience and occasion	All evidence is accompanied by effective discussion and analysis. Writer supports/ develops their analysis with appeals such as ethos, pathos, and logos and effective word choice and reasoning. Stylistic choices and consistent and appropriate for the audience and occasion of the piece
Organization Clear organization of introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Use of transitions. Balance of claims, evidence, and analysis	Paper lacks a clear introduction/ conclusion OR organization of body paragraphs fails to address one of the key elements of classical argument. OR lack of clear organizing concept hinders communication of ideas and support of argument	Not all organizational elements are present; intro paragraph may need clarification or development, body paragraphs lack balance between artistic proofs, inartistic proofs, and refutations. Transitions are uncommon or frequently awkward and unclear.	All organization elements are present, but may be inconsistent in their clarity, articulation, or balance. Transitions are consistently used, but may occasionally be unclear, wordy, or awkward.	Introduction engages the reader, provides a clear thesis, and establishes author's ethos. Body paragraphs include effective topic sentences, artistic and inartistic proofs, and refutations. Conclusions are provided for body paragraphs and the paper as a whole. Clear, effective transitions are provided to clarify links between ideas.
Refutations Demonstrates insight into other possible perspectives, conceding or refuting these ideas where appropriate	Discussion of other perspectives is unreasonable, inaccurate, or absent.	Rarely demonstrates insight into other perspectives. These observations are frequently less detailed, biased, or inaccurate. Writing shows little interest in fairly addressing multiple perspectives.	Frequently demonstrates insight into other perspectives. These observations may not be consistently developed or as detailed. Discussion of concessions or refutations seems aimed solely at supporting the author's claims rather than demonstrating insight into the issue	Consistently demonstrates insight into others' perspectives, presenting these other viewpoints in a fair, detailed, articulate manner. Concessions or refutations of these ideas
Voice Clear expression, appropriate level of language, and effective word choice. Clarity, grammar, and variety of sentences	Writing is significantly hindered by informal, inappropriate word choice, awkward, wordy, fragmented, or run-on sentences.	Sentence structure lacks variety, transitions are rare, or awkward sentence constructions are present. Word choice can be informal, vague, or inappropriate for the subject of the essay.	The writer shows good control over simple sentence structure but inconsistent control over complex sentences and transitions. Awkward or wordy constructions and lapses in diction are rare and do not significantly hinder meaning.	Sentence structure reflects logic and sense, helping to show how ideas relate. Transitions and variation in sentence structure add interest to the text. Clear, effective, formal diction actively supports credibility of argument.
Conventions Standard spelling, punctuation, capitalization, MLA format, and citation	Multiple errors in punctuation, spelling, grammar, and citation show a lack of attention to detail or careful editing.	Paragraphs frequently have multiple errors. Ideas are not significantly hindered,  but essay clearly could have been more carefully proofread	Occasional errors may be present, but are limited to uncommon words, grammatical constructions or novel citation/format problems. Generally, the text is clear.	Text uses correct spelling, punctuation, capitalization, and correct MLA format and citation.

Plan of improvement for classical argument

Aaron Street

AP Language and Composition Period 2

Mr. Street

10/6/15

Plan of improvement for classical argument

Introduction:

S1

S2

F1

F2

Confirmation:
S1

S2

F1

F2

Refutation

S1

S2

F1

F2
Conclusion

S1

S2

F1

F1

You don’t need exactly 2 of each

• When you discuss:
• Be specific about what is happening or what needs to happen. Describe in detail
• Provide a specific passage (quote) or location in your text where this is happening / should happen
• Provide a detailed suggestion about how to do this -- “Try it like this”

Use complete sentences.

Note: You will be referring to these when you write your final draft -- your final will be highlighted and annotated to show where you have done these things